continuation- holding on and letting go, and selfishness

Holding on is more painful and difficult at times than letting go. Sometimes a way of holding on is letting go. Many times we hold on cause we are scared of many things. We are unsure of ourselves or of the other person. .What if either ceases to feel the same way? But then this is the true test isn't it? At times we know nothing is going to change but the pain of being apart is too much and we do not want to be apart. Many times letting go makes people come back.. Not that they've gone away anywhere but this would make them come back in the true sense, without anything holding them back, without any conditions, but for that we have to let go of the fear.. And this is my biggest challenge. A war bigger than the one against impatience. It could be for most of us.. the fear.. it is entangled with impatience, or maybe the impatience is due to this fear.. nonetheless, it has to be fought.. After all we have just this one life.. We do all that we think and feel is good and which makes us happy in a way.. But sometimes we end up doing things that do not quite make us happy, and we feel its derived happiness that we will get.. maybe yes. Sacrificing and doing something someone else wants might makes us happy, but is it true pure flawless happiness? No.
We will have that tiny something in our heart always.. that we didn't do what we wanted to. God and our own soul will keep reminding us, of our duty that we owe to them.. Our first duty is to ourselves. Might seem a bit selfish, but we need to really think about this. cause if we are not happy we won't be able to make anyone else happy. and then if those people really love us they won't stand in the way of our happiness with unreasonable demands.. simple thing.. but not accepted of thought of as simply..